Hi Playmakers,
I’m sitting here cooking up a pot of marinara, as I start assembling my first Christmas Eve lasagna. I had no idea until a few days ago that this dish was a popular one to serve up before the big holiday, but it sounded like a fun idea. So, I decided to kick off this new tradition this year.
As a new mom, this is a year of new traditions for me. But last year was very different.
A year ago, our home was empty and quiet. It marked the end of one of the hardest years of my life. Our journey to parenthood had been long and arduous — with a significant impact on our marriage, well-being, and bank account. My dog of nearly 15 years had passed away that spring, leaving me mourning my youth and facing a crippling millennial realization of mortality. Coupled with professional challenges and burnout, I also had no idea if my business would survive in the next year.
A few months prior, I had tried to, quite literally, run from my problems by packing my dog’s ashes in my bag and driving from California to the Arctic Circle with my husband. I deleted social media. I ignored emails. I totally erased myself from existence.
400 miles south of the Arctic Circle in Kluane National Park in the Yukon Territory
Spoiler: running from your problems doesn’t work (it can sure be a pretty distraction, however.)
Now, back to Christmas Eve 2024.
I remember looking in the mirror, barely even recognizing myself, and wondering, “Where did I go wrong?” The joy of a youthful glow had long sunken away from my face.
A few weeks later, I would become pregnant with my son, Roman. A month after that, a call would change my life and the course of my business. A spark of inspiration — something I had long forgotten — started to appear. The long winter began to clear.
The hardest season of my life laid to rest, and the brightest moments of life soon came.
Today, as I stir this pot of marinara, I think about how much has changed in one single year. How far my professional and personal life has come. How an unforeseeable future laid ahead of me. How big my appetite has grown to build ambitiously this year, when only a year ago I was hiding from sight.
I tell you this story not because I want to gloat or brag about a picturesque life. In fact, it is quite the opposite. I want you to know that whether or not this is the holiday you had imagined for yourself, the most important gift you can give yourself is simple:
Bet on you.
You are your own biggest cheerleader. Never count yourself out. Never short your potential. The world has enough naysayers, so don’t be your own worst enemy.
The good times will come and go, but it is you that will remain. Get comfortable being you. Keep reaching for the life you want. Keep going.
And never stop asking yourself, “Why not me?”
Happy holidays.
Pav, Roman, and I, celebrating our first holiday
With love,
Jenny, Pav, and Roman
P.S. What’s your holiday menu looking like this year?
